Saturday, 25 June 2011
I had another opportunity to assist somebody to cross the line. I give you the best of fresh seeing by GiulianoR, if you like to see the whole procces read it here.
"First I want to write out the fact that there is no me in the most simple way. It's mindblowing really how the entire civilization is build on this false assumption. It is hidden pretty deep, I had to dig and put everything I thought I knew away to see it."
"Today I was at a forest by myself, taking some time to really focus and take the final look.
And I have seen it, for real. This is it. It's really not what I expected. There's no great realization or some magic stuff to it. Just a thing that's true. It would be really ordinary if everybody saw it. It is probably the most logical thing I ever encountered in my life. There are two things I know for sure now.
1. There is existence as in: reality exists
2. There is no thing that has the qualities of a self
The world is a lot simpler than before. There are no layers anymore. If I compare this to were "I" was a few weeks ago there is one thing that stands out the most. First, experiencing the world was like looking outside the window of a small dark room. Everything filtered to the assumed self. People make the world so small and limited by the assumption of self.
Now there's just freedom. Freedom to do, feel, try whatever comes up. There is no me choosing or doing but choices are definitely made. That's the tricky part that I couldn't see before. I assumed that to see there is no me would change the way I interacted with the world. Well, not at all. It's just the same as before. Because: THERE WAS NEVER AN I TO BEGIN WITH."
"There were a couple of key elements that kept me going:
1. I kept telling myself: this must be simple.
2. I was harsh on myself, willing to question everything.
3. I had faith that ‘the truth would set me free’.
4. I was hitting it from all angles; if something didn’t work I abandoned it.
5. I did not take myself (which doesn’t exist) too serious.
6. From when I was young I also had a feeling that I wasn’t really responsible for my actions. There was too much random stuff going on, it just didn’t seem right. I really wanted to know why.
7. I JUST NEVER QUIT. NEVER. "
"I must say nature did a lot for me today. In the end it’s stupid that I was waiting for the right moment and circumstances to really look. But anyway it was what gave me the final push. First I tried walking around with an empty mind. Then I sat down. Looking. Not at thing but at the totality of it. Just being there with reality playing itself out before my eyes. Birds flying, dogs walking by, leafs moving in the wind. It was all so real. Then I tried to look inside to find a self. Of course I didn’t find it. The what I did was try to build up a feeling and image of self. Tried to make it as strong as I could. Well, I couldn’t. While sitting there I read something StepVhen said about there being thoughts about a self but not even a thought was or showed a self. Like a collection of thoughts dancing around this empty space. Then I ‘admitted’ that there is no me. Perhaps this is not the right word. I saw it. That doesn’t fit perfectly either. I KNEW it. No question. There is nothing inside this body or mind that is anything like a self. There is nothing in the whole fucking universe that is anything like a self. Things just are what they are. Do what they do. Nothing more to it. Stuff isn’t happening to anyone or something. It is just happening. Like I read a thousand times here: fingers typing, thought flowing, seeing without a seer.
What is left inside is a feeling of space. Infinite space."
"Please all. I’m begging you. Be honest. Question everything. Never give up. If I can get this, you can. Focus on the fact that there is no you. Do NOT take that sentence for granted. Explore it. Hit it from all angles. Really if you recognize this you will know. As long as you don’t: keep focusing on the absence of a self. Test the hell out of it. Therein lies the key.
If you feel that you are ready to look for yourself but need some guidance, email me. It's really not that difficult to see. It is already here, it's just a belief that stand in a way. And a bit of fear...Once that clears up seeing happens.
Wednesday, 22 June 2011
I read a book once, a very powerful book which had power to clean up programming in the brain. After finishing reading it, life was never the same. It was "Easy way to stop smoking" by Alan Carr. He just found the way to show the truth of what is going on with smoking that made all attachments fall. For me it was 4 days reading, not once since I even thought about sucking on tobacco. It's been years.
All that book did was clean up beliefs associated with smoking and so it naturally drops. I thought, wouldn't that be nice to read a book and drop the illusion of self. Just like that.
So I run this idea by my friends at Ruthless Truth and I'm exited to announce that this book is on the way.
We each will contribute something to help to see the obvious. It will be a nice mix of best ideas from different perspectives and angles that will leave no doubt about absence of a separate self. There is a lot of experience among us now, we know what works and all together we will sound this call to look at the reality with fresh eyes. If you haven't yet, this book is for you.
I'm looking forward to this unfoldment to take the flight.
Sunday, 19 June 2011
I love doing cover up tattoos. Every time I get a chance to transform something old and ugly into something fresh and beautiful. Love the feeling.
Same with helping to open eyes.
Re: Ok, Rookie, step in and engage!
by Nomad~Kamda » Wed Jun 15, 2011 9:16 am
Rookie here- I'll accept your invitation, 315.
The last few days have been quite interesting. Examining, for the first time really, the notion and experience of self, of me. I'm a bit puzzled by the fact that the assumption of self has been left unscrutinized for so many years and amazed by the ease with which any notion of self is dissolved by asking if that notion is really true...
So you asked to bring my self to you for further examination. Problem is, I can't really find a self when looking for it. Yet, something seems to be holding me back; as if I cannot really accept the fact that there might actually be no one there...
I would describe the place I'm at as clinging to a very vague, yet very intimate and familiar "sense of self".
by Nomad~Kamda » Fri Jun 17, 2011 11:58 am
I'm happy to announce that I have not turned into a vegetable.
Also, I have not suddenly gained supernatural powers. I would like to speak to the management about this.
Kidding aside, I understand that it is customary that any newly liberated write up a big post about their experiences. I'll give it my best shot.
It is difficult to point down "the shift" to a particular moment. In retrospect it is more like a process that took a couple of days, a process of a misconception (" there is a (real) self") being seen for what is. Reading some of the material on this forum, some of the associated blogs and really taking time to seriously examine the notion of self was a very helpful preparation for the letting go. And it is quite simple really. What is asked is to simply, quitely and without interruption look at all the assumptions, beliefs and conceptions of the idea of "you", the one living your life, the sailor that steers your boat on the ocean of existence so to speak.
Looking at this, really looking at this question: " What is referred to when I speak/think of "me"" is a big taboo. It is seen as either a pubescent attempt to find ones place in the world or a deluded question asked by nutcases, schizophreniacs or new age softies. It is considered to be self-evident and in no need of further scrutiny.
Well: it is. There is nothing there. Absolutely nothing. Never been and never will. Void, emptiness, nothing at all. Just a messy knot of unchecked assumptions, memories and a drama story that wouldn't look out-of-place in a soap opera.
I understand a lot more of the way that language has been used here on RT in order to point to the truth of this, that there truly is no self, especially the harsh language. You somehow have to get the full attention on that which people call themselves. I guess that for a lot of people, anger, defensiveness and a sense of being attacked is the right trigger to get this self-idea clearly in the picture. Then that can be examined and shown to be wholly fictional.
For me, the trigger was fear. As I posted earlier, it was a deep-rooted fear of losing control, of " turning into a vegetable" and not being able to take care of myself and my loved one. A very real, visceral fear that was experienced very tangibly around the stomach. A very familiar fear. 315 gently guided me to really look at this fear. What was it protecting?
At this point, something interesting happened. The eyes closed and the feeling of fear became clearer and more pronounced. All that was done was looking, simple looking. No effort, no straining, nothing. The tightness of the fear released and what remained was warmth, radiating outwards. It was clearly seen that the "self" that was thought to be protected, shielded from an apparently hostile world, was not there. There was literally nothing to be protected.
What really did the trick for me was 315's empahsis on acknowlediging this fear for what is- not trying to negate it, run away from it or any such thing- just look it straight in the eye. What is it trying to protect?
i can see that the knot is loosening. good. now step forward. no you, never was. see it. let the seeing happen. there is no you really to let it happen. just let it unfold.
You are seeing it already, just the mind says that no, it's like being used to one thing and expecting it to be same.
These words pushed me right over the edge. What I needed was a real faith (perhaps trust is a better word) that what was being pointed to is really actually the case. There was an instant of not knowing anything, not doing anything and then the belief in self fell away completely.
Quite a bit of physical phenomena came up with that, as the knot of self untangled, very intense waves of heat were felt throughout the body. Even now, the senses relay information much more intensly. It is as if reality, experience is seen in its complete vibrant aliveness. There is no one experiencing it, seeing it through layers and layers of assumptions, fears etc. Much more direct.
Where there was this knot in the stomach there is now quiet emptiness, nothing.
For the rest, nothing much has changed, really. I had these ideas of seeing through the illusion of self would be a dramatic moment, a great achievement with the audience gasping in excitement. No such thing- the only thing that happens is that the story of self is seen for what it is- a story, a work of fiction. This it has always been. It simply was left unchecked and taken for granted.
It's funny to realise that there has actually never been a self behind it all- that it was simply the one great unchecked assumption that just needed one honest glance to dissolve. That is really all it takes- one instant of really seeing it for what it is.
Experience now is pretty much the same as it was earlier, exactly the same to be precise, simply ordinary everyday existence with assorted thoughts and feelings. The only small difference is that it is now no longer assumed that there is anyone experiencing it, there is just this experience.
That's all I've got at this moment.
I really want to express deep gratitude to 315 for the gentle pointing and giving me that final push.
To read what happens in between, click here:
Now go free yourself from imaginary self.
If help needed, do not hesitate to ask.
Monday, 13 June 2011
It has been 9 months kind of since I entered Ruthless Truth arena to find out what's the deal with liberation. I was guided to look at the fact that I do not exists in reality as myself. I looked and seeing happened. Simple as that. Life started to make sense as well as words of masters.
Life is abundant, we have so many theories, philosophies, religions and spiritual practices that promise us life full of joy. Everyone wants to be happy. But there is some work to be done first.
When you sit in a car it does not start by itself, you need a key, you need to turn the key and then ignition happens. Right? You can't just sit in a car and relax fully, do some meditation or read some enlightened texts or pray and expect that car will turn on by itself.
So for liberation to happen you also need a key, and you need to turn that key, then liberation happens. Seeing happens and search is over... I see that people want to wake up, but have no clue, what to do. So search is on- next program, next cd, retreat, book, etc. And yes, all those programs and good advise works! For a while...and 25 years later all they have is a collection of wisdom of others, names of masters and knowledge of ways. But no realisation...
I have been looking for happiness, but on my way I was blind until it hit me- "no self"... I knew that this was a real deal, I knew I had to investigate, so I did.
Without strong desire to wake up and readiness to sacrifice all beliefs for truth, "no self" is invisible! You can read it and not register. The brain is not a fertile ground for this seed yet. But if it registers and starts expanding one day sooner or later realisation happens. Yeah, when you turn the key, of course.
The key- there is no you.
Tu turn it one really needs to investigate this fact and reach resolution.
You may think, that liberation is beyond mind and is not found in thinking or you can give it a test, think for yourself and see what happens. ;) Open scepticism is a great friend here.
If you sit and intentionally relax, do work, drill through cloud covers, meditate in order to get free, you are looking at a wrong place. None of other people's processes are helpful for you in order for the shift to happen. So unless somebody is guiding you to directly see no self, they are guiding you away from liberation. Trust me. You are on your own in your own quest for freedom.
Ruthless truth arena these days is the best place to look for help, if needed. These guys and girls do not sell anything, they don't want anything else but help to set you free. And they will cut through illusions like butter. It's the place where you turn the key and life takes over.
I invite you to check out "no self" thing personally and passionately.
The end of seeking is the beginning of exploration. :) yes, there is time for cleaning up and once it finishes, the ride is smooth and it's definitely fun!
Liberation is nothing else but truth. You know, truth will set you free.